My Current Mood in a Picture

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Sunday, September 30, 2007

I got attacked by a Butterfly!

It's great to go outside from your cave-like bedroom, and experience the garden you rarely visit. So I thought some fresh are and nature inhaling (Please, inhale nature responsibly, and don't inhale any nature that looks suspicious). Since I was going out there, Mum made me water the garden. (Not as bad as it sounds, it's good for your health)

I was watering the garden, when suddenly, a small butterfly launched out of the bush and bumped against my face...

Either it was trying to kiss me, or it was trying to defend its home from Ye Water Dragon Known as The Hose Beast of Abbotsford. I like to think it was trying to kiss me.

It looked kind of like a Fairy, so that might be what it was also. You never know...

- Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author

Drop - by Osamu Tezuka

A short Tezuka Anime about a sailor who is very thirsty. This is the first time I've watched it, so my analysis of this Anime isn't exactly developed enough to make a long comment, other than the fact that it's a quirky cartoon about the old paradox of a thirsty sailor in an ocean of water that's undrinkable. Enjoy!


Another Osamu Tezuka short Anime, about the nature of memories. I really ought to let more people know about his short Anime's, because although Tezuka was famous for his TV animations which were longer, he could create short works that were just as profound. I had not seen this one before, but I was awestruck!

Rush Hour 3 - He is Mi and I am Yu

This is a funny clip from "Rush Hour 3" that my mate Angus sent to me. He's Chinese-Australian, so he loves Asian styled humor like this. So I'm really posting it for him...


This is another Osamu Tezuka short Anime that he completed before he died. The premise of it is that it is a single view shot the whole way through the film, without changing the "camera" angle from a single directional view shot. It's also fun, too. Hope you enjoy it!

Osamu Tezuka - Broken Down Film (1985)

Neil Gaiman isn't the only creative person I like. Despite being dead now, I have an appreciation of the Anime of Osamu Tezuka, who practically invented Japanese cartoons. Other than doing "Astro Boy" and "Kimba the White Lion", he also made a few independent Anime films. This is one of them, and you're in for a real treat. "Broken Down Film" is structured like a very old cartoon on a worn out film reel, so that the characters are inconvienced by jumps of the picture, and grainy resolution that interrupts interaction between the characters. Enjoy!

Demon Cats

Cats can be funny, but if you don't treat them right, they can be downright scary. These cats are very angry, as you can see. Their owners are idiots who won't leave them alone when they try to rest. I own a cat, and I would never treat my cat like the cat owners in this video do. These cats have so many "issews" that they need Dr. Phil.

TeenAuthor's SQB: New direction in postings

Well, you may have noticed that instead of giving you links to YouTube videos, I can give you the actual videos now, since I got myself a YouTube account. This enables me to post videos and still acknowledge that I did not make these videos, so that I do not break any copyright rules.

Posting YouTube videos is an exciting new feature of my blog, however, for those Media Traditionalists, the SQB will not, I repeat, will not, become merely just another Video blog. This blog is about me. I simply wish to share with you the YouTube videos that I like watching.

However, I started out on this blog, as a mere Luddite stepping his toe into the World Wide Web. I still hold a commitment to posting original material, as well as news about my writing career.

Hopefully I will be able to share with you this piece of cyberspace in a new, and refreshing way, and theoretically, that will get me more visitors. In closing, the original material/YouTube material quota will be balanced for fairness to my loyal readers.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.


Just a funny collection of Feline related clips I found on YouTube. Hope you like it!

Neil Gaiman and Scandanavian Death Metal

This is the last installment of my "Neil Gaiman YouTube Extravaganza" since I can't get the "Neil Scary Trousers Gaiman" one to post to my blog. Enjoy!

Neil Gaiman at Keplers - Jewish upbringing

Not many may know this, but Neil Gaiman is Jewish, though his upbringing may not be obvious when you see what he writes, he drops it into his work occasionally. Enjoy!

Movie Review: Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny

Movie review time again.

Those familiar with the legends of Rock and Roll will recognise the many references to Metal Mythology as presented in this entertaining, but crude, motion picture. It is a fictionalised telling of the formation of the band "Tenacious D", a rock band with Jack Black and Kyle Gass as the members of a musical dynamic duo.

On this project, Jack Black was given full reign over the creative process, and it shows. This is purely a Rock and Roll romp, with lots of swearing, innuendo and "power slide" stage moves. It is a tribute to Rock music, but at the same time, it references the many "Quest" genre films and stories. Ben Stiller appears in this as a long haired Guitar shop worker with too much time on his hands, and Meat Loaf stars in the opening "Kickapoo" sequence as Jack Black's father.

All in all, only the Musically minded of Rock and Metal will appreciate this film, but it has universal appeal for those not quite as entrenched in Rock music as Jack Black is. I give it 7 out of 10 "Picks of Destiny".

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Neil Gaiman Discusses H. P. Lovecraft

Neil Gaiman talks about H.P. Lovecraft, another Horror writer, in a very entertaining way. One of my favorite YouTube Videos.

Authors@Google: Neil Gaiman

This is a nice video that YouTube of Neil Gaiman doing a book talk and reading. I post this as part of my "Neil Gaiman YouTube Extravaganza", which will feature at least Three YouTube videos of Neil. Enjoy!

Movie Review: Edward Scissorhands

It's that time again, where I review a movie I have just seen, and I wrestle with my memory of what I have watched to put together a meaningful review that informs and entertains.

And all I can say about Tim Burton's "Edward Scissorhands" is...

Wow. Just... Wow.

You wouldn't think now, since Johnny Depp has become a teen idol persona again, that he can also play outsider characters that touch your soul. In this, he plays Edward Scissorhands, the created man made by a Professor who looks remarkably like a very old Vincent Price... wait a minute, that IS Vincent Price, giving the last ever film performance of his life!

Anyway, the Professor dies, before completing his creation, only Edward's hands are incomplete, leaving him with scissors for hands. These scissorhands, are both a blessing, and a curse. He is gifted in topiary cutting, hairdressing, and dog grooming, and his uniqueness brings joy to a suburban neighbourhood, yet these scissorhands are also a curse. He cannot touch things without destroying them, and cannot touch the woman he loves most. And what makes things worse is that the townsfolk exploit his talents and outlook on life for personal gain.

I won't give away the ending, but let me tell you this. I almost cried, my tear ducts were about to burst, as it was so beautifully sad. Johnny Depp is alone in a world that doesn't understand him, in a movie back before everybody wanted a piece of him in Hollywood. Depp, when he works with Tim Burton, works at his best.

Tim Burton is the King of Gothic cinema, and has endured long after the Gothic movement declined. He reminds us of the beauty of what the Gothic movement stood for, and its emphasis on the unique over the conforming society that the young had to start out from. This movie, next to "The Nightmare Before Christmas" is part of Burton's eternal connection with Goth, influencing many film-makers and directors since his humble origins as a Disney animator.

I give this 10 out of 10 "Scissorhands" as my Movie Rating.

Friday, September 28, 2007

Finally done Issue #3

Supervillain! Issue #3. You know you want to read it.

Come on, it has Ninjas attacking a picnic. Now I bet you can't resist.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Supervillain! #3 almost done

I've almost finished Supervillain! Issue #3, which sets the new format for the series, as a collection of stories that is serialised monthly. This one, in my mind, is the best one I've done so far. There is a balance of action with the dialogue of politics (I try my best to make the Politics interesting: "Mayor Moonshard vs Oscar Wilde" will serve as the politics side of the series for the "Decision 2050" story arc. Also, the first multi part story of the series begins with "Leroy's Big Score: Part One". Needless to say, the title suggests what might be happening with that plotline without giving too much away. What kind of "Big Score" is Leroy in for? Read Issue #3 to find out!

Another story I will keep under wraps apart from this, it will introduce Edgar Allan Poe to the plot continuity of the Supervillain! universe.

I will use the remainder of this post to remind my loyal readers to inform others of Supervillain! if you enjoy the series. Also, in the back of every issue of Supervillain is my "Unpaid Ads" section, where I promote blogs and websites I like. This issue's starring Unpaid Ad will be for Chris Sims' "Invincible Super Blog", a Comics and Pop Culture blog ( If you think I would like a blog you know about, contact me at in order to secure a spot in the next issues' section. Remember, my publication is aimed at the educated, tasteful reader of (relatively) mature literature, so no tasteless Porn or Insurance company links please.


Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Trip to the Art Gallery of NSW (and other places)

So I was taken to the Art Gallery after a really bad exam, which went horribly. Essentially my Mum took me to cheer me up, also to take me to see the Bookbinder's Exhibition before it closed the next day. There were some good bound books, and the one somebody made of J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit" was particularly interesting, as were the Aesop's Fables one and the Patrick White book.

Anyway, I discovered a Book Sale at the Reference Library where the exhibition was being held, and for $1.50 I got a great looking art catalogue for a German exhibition and a book of education sociology, which to me looked very interesting indeed, and when I have time I will read both. Also, Mum bought a hardcover catalogue for my Art Exam research, for $10.

Anyway, after we had to go to the car since the Parking Meter was ticking away, Mum took me Shoe Shopping. Ever since I was small, I loathed shoe shopping, but this experience wasn't nearly as bad as I remember Shoe Shopping as being, and I came out of the shop with a pair of black, slip on shoes, and they fit me rather well.

Then, I needed to get some afternoon tea, so we went to Rozelle (I live in Sydney) to Baker's Delight, which had Cinnamon Rolls. I was sent into the shop with $10 to buy two Cinnamon Rolls, and an Almond Roll for Mum. However, the lure of the Darling Street Books shop was too great, as the man who owned the place had looked out for me and tried to see if Carl Jung's "Man and his Symbols" was in stock. It was, and I bought it with $11.50 of my own money, and rushing to Baker's Delight, I bought the Cinnamon Rolls and the Almond one. However...

When I reached the spot where Mum needed to pick me up, she complained of traffic, and was "miffed" that she had to go around several times looking for me because I was in Darling Street Books. She argued with me in the car, happy for me that I was able to find the book I wanted from Darling Street Books, yet she was angry (and rightly so) that I had made her forced to circle the block to find me, when she could have found a parking spot.

I had found Jung, but at what cost? Perhaps more than $11.50, I can tell you...

A true story from today's adventures of mine.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Supervillain! Issue #2

This is the latest installment of my serial, Supervillain!, which is still a free E-book issue.

Currently I'm working on the third, action packed Special Edition issue that has three stories "for the price of none"...

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

The Dialectizer! Internet Fun for All!

This site translates any webpage or text (apart from Wikipedia, though I'm working on how to get past that barrier) into many humorous dialects.

Try it on blogs, on company websites, on anything! It even works on Gutenberg Project e-books with HTML features, which provides endless hours, of linguistic entertainment.

Here is the link to the Gutenberg Project:

What hath the Internet wrought?

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Supervillain!: Issue #1 Out Now!

The free e-Book of my serialised story sequence, "Supervillain!" is out now from, and in serialising it, I hope to be able to write more in less time, as my HSC is looming over me again like a vulture. It's a fusion of Fantasy with the Superhero genre of comics, only it's a prose serial.

It's wacky, it's weird, and it has elements of real world history in an alternate world where Fey Folk co-exist with Humans. In this, some celebrities are Fey Folk and thus are Immortals: Oscar Wilde is running for Mayor, H.P. Lovecraft teaches a 3rd Grader class, while around them, the world is changing and they must keep up with the times.

But really it's me having fun as a writer, building a mythology with parts of the world we know and sticking it together in the world of the imagination that I know.

Here's the link:

Hope you like it, and if you do, tell your friends about my serial so circulation increases.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, TeenAuthor.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Free E-Book: "A Taster Plate of Scrumptious Previews"

This is my free E-Book designed to showcase my upcoming work in the book world. I love to write, it is why I live. All are unfinished drafts, so don't take the works featured in it too seriously, but if you have some pointers for me, please leave some comments.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, Former Teen, Still Author.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Can I really call myself "TeenAuthor" anymore?

I feel like I'm growing up. Not in the physical sense, but the metaphysical, in maturity as well as body. After completing my final Christian Ministry and Leadership course, which I did not want to do and was forced to do for the 1 Unit towards my HSC, I feel like I have completed one of the rites of passage, that await me as the end of my Year Group's schooling career approaches. As a Pathways student, I will be left behind by my friends to complete my HSC, but despite the immaturity of the Year 11 group who will take their place, and which I will become part of in a sense, I cannot help, after a long, philosophical (and non-drugs influenced too!) conversation with one of my closest friends, that it could well be that I am becoming a man.

I am not yet 18, the official mark of manhood for Australians of Y Chromosome ownership, but yet, other cultures have boys that become men at much younger ages, such as in the Jewish religion. Perhaps, it has come the time when I have to finally confront the end of my childhood. But as much as I miss my childhood, I feel the urge to join into my age group's celebration of Adult Life.

I contemplated the nature of my joyous and mournful writing career. Am I more than just a teenage author, now that my childhood is ending and my identity as a Man has come? Will my talent transcend fleeting youth?

I say, it will, as I live to write, and I write to live. My work is part of my being, the way I reach out to people.

I write, to be loved. Not for fame, fortune, and material gain. Simply, to be loved. It is Human to want Love, and it is also Human to create. Will I be loved by my readers? Only my development as a writer will be able to tell me that. I used to think I could do without a single edit, now, I feel it must happen, or my works will be like Peter Pan, never developing past adolescence, in eternal childishness forevermore, and I would be ruined as an artist and creator.

But I will not give up. I had even begun my first sign of growing in wisdom. I was not discouraged by criticism of my work by a friend, and I will continue the book I discussed with them, taking on board the advice I was given, advice which breathed new life into a book struggling to learn to walk, after crawling so long as an infant idea.

I am a young man, and young men grow. I must develop, lest I grow stubborn in my old ways, facing reality as much as I write my literary fantasies that make people think.

And I will grow, oh yes. And I will conquer.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin. Former Teen, Still Author.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

My Made Up Angst-Words

Here are some words I made up relating to Angst:

Angst Sandwich:

Meaning 1: A metaphorical food that represents something that is particularly Angsty, Emo, Gothic, gloomy, or just plain Dark.

Man, Interview with a Vampire was a complete Angst Sandwich!

Meaning 2: (phrase) "To feel like one has eaten an Angst Sandwich": This is the feeling one gets in one's stomach when you are miserable.

Gee, I feel like I just ate an Angst Sandwich since my Girlfriend dumped me!


1: Something connected to or provoking feelings of Angst, extreme Angst in fact.

The Used's lyrics are Angstalicious!


1: An artwork, poem, musical composition/song, or work of literature that is so profound in its Angst, justifying every instance of it, that it trancends mere whining, it is ART.

The Catcher In The Rye is an Angst-erpiece and a Half!

Seriously though, contemporary words are popping up all the time. As long as history continues, new words to define it will emerge. Spread these ones around, and remember:


Sincerely, Jacob Martin, TeenAuthor.

Sunday, September 9, 2007

100 Posts-a-versary!

I was waiting around for some decent material to bump up the posts before I started celebrating, as filler posts are bad.

Happy 100 Posts-A-Versary!

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, TeenAuthor.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

Man Jailed for Jaywalking! APEC Outrage!

Yes, Australia is turning into a totalitarian regime now. Hopefully once APEC is over this police brutality will stop, but I'm too wise to think any better of the Government.

Sincerely, Jacob Martin, TeenAuthor.

Movie Review: Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome

I liked this Mad Max outing the best out of all the trilogy.

Mad Max has his camel cart stolen, which leads him to Bartertown, where he must do battle in the Thunderdome to get it back. The rules of Thunderdome are: Two men enter, one man leaves, and there are no rules.

Also, Max finds a lost group of children and adults who want to find the Tomorrow-Morrow Land of the Cities and Skyscrapers.

Plus, Tina Turner stars as Aunty in this. She's scary not because of her character, but because of her fashion wardrobe.

I give this 8 "Thunderdomes" out of 10.

Movie Review: Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior

This Mad Max outing has more emphasis on the dystopic future than the last one, and a prologue of the history that precedes it is presented at the beginning.

Mad Max must get gasoline, and the world is becoming more brutal and ruthless in Humanity's struggle to survive. A fortress with a supply of "juice" is under constant attack from the Humungus Gang, and Max's only hope of survival is to help out the occupants of this fort.

There is more action than the last one in this sequel, but I didn't like it as much as the remarkably less grim and gritty original film.

I give it 7 "Gas tanks" out of 10.

Friday, September 7, 2007

Movie Review: Mad Max

This is a movie that requires no intellectual effort to enjoy. Mel Gibson stars in this back in the days of big hair and big egos.

The violence that lies in the underbelly of 1970s Australian society is reflected here, and although it sometimes appears over the top, George Miller sparingly uses it to show just how far into madness people can go.

Melodramatic but fun.

8 and a Half "Muscle Cars" out of Ten, that's what I'm giving it.

Movie Review: Stranger than Fiction

Will Ferrell has an actual emotional range. Despite what his lowbrow comedies which he tends to star in these days would have you believe, he's a really good actor.

An author is planning to kill off her main character, but has writer's block. Her character is Harold Crick, an IRS Tax Man, and he is real as the next real person.

CRINGE: as Harold struggles through his dull, bureaucratic lifestyle, infuriating others and himself!

CRY: as Harold struggles to come to terms with the impending death that awaits him!

Say AWWW!: as Harold discovers his love interest and rejects his boring bureacracy that formerly dominated his life!

I give this 8 "Wristwatches" out of 10...

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Movie Review: The Pursuit of Happyness

This is a heartbreaking movie. Having seen Will Smith in such comedy classics as The Fresh Prince of Bel Air TV show, and Men In Black, you wouldn't think his emotional range is that big. But in this film, about Chris Gardner, even he can make you teary.

Gardner's life as portrayed in this movie is a struggle between poverty and keeping enough face at the corporate company he works for to make an impression that lasts, so that he gets hired out of his internship, his only ticket out of financial destruction and homelessness.

Watch it. You have to. If you don't, you'll never know how fine the line is between survival and living below accepted standards of health, happiness, and love of life.

I give this 8 out of 10 "Bone Scan Machines".

Saturday, September 1, 2007

Movie Review: The Simpsons Movie

This movie, although entertaining, will not win an Oscar by any means. It is a remarkable technical acheivement, and many of the subplots are fun, but like many of the later Simpsons episodes, you either like them or you don't.

It's a good movie. I'm not saying it's bad, but it probably won't change the series all that much. A subplot development between Bart and Ned Flanders is one of the most interesting, just as memorable as the "Spider Pig" moments. After years of abuse, Bart is looking for a new father figure who respects him and his needs.

Social commentary about the environment and government power in crisis (possibly making a slight at the Hurricane Katrina crisis in New Orleans, when Springfield is "domed") is rife, and many of the witticisms bring deserved laughs.

I give it Three and a Half "Sprinkled Donuts" out of Five.